Expert Series: Sleep Routine Tips from Kaitlin Klimmer
Sleep is a big topic for new parents - and understandably so! If our little ones aren’t sleeping well, chances are good that we aren’t either.
We know that sleep in the early years is important for our children’s growth and development. Getting enough sleep each night leads to better outcomes in physical health, cognition, socioemotional development, and behavioral functioning.
Luckily for us, there are a few things we can do to help our babies and toddlers get the best sleep possible.
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Have a consistent wake up window in the morning.
Waking up with your baby around the same time each day (within a 30 minute window) can help set your baby’s circadian clock, making it easier for them to fall into a daily rhythm. In turn, this helps their body feel sleepy at predictable times during the day and at bedtime.
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Use light to our advantage
Natural light is a power driver of our circadian rhythm. Getting outside for a few minutes in the morning and again in the early evening can go a long way in helping set our child’s internal body clock. It’s also useful to keep your baby’s sleep space dim during the day, and save the black-out blinds for nighttime sleep.
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Have a consistent nap and bedtime routine
Research tells us that having a consistent nap and bedtime routine helps children fall asleep faster, wake up less, and stay asleep longer. The more consistently we use our routines, the more effective they become.
What goes into a good nap and bedtime routine?
When we’re building our child’s bedtime routine, it can be helpful to pull elements from four different categories: hygiene, sleep environment, connection, and soothing.
Hygiene encompasses everything our little ones have to do to get ready for bed. For example, brushing their teeth, getting a fresh diaper, and changing into their Petit Lem jammies.
Next, we want to think of our child’s sleep space. Closing the blinds, turning the sound machine on, and making sure the temperature in the room is not too cold or too warm (16 to 20 degrees Celcius is recommended for sleep). Since blankets are not safe for children under 2, pair your child’s jammies with a Petit Lem sleep sack to keep them safe and warm at night.
Then, we’re going to bring in some connection. Even if you’re cosleeping with your little one at night, sleep inherently represents a type of separation between us and our child. When we’re faced with ‘bedtime battles’ in the evening, it’s rarely because our children are fighting sleep - usually, they’re fighting separation from us! Bringing lots of connection into our sleep routines can go a long way in making that separation feel easier to bear.
Connection will look different for each family. This might come as a surprise, but having a wild dance party or a rough and tumble session before bed can be a great way to help your child get any last minute ‘sillies’ out of their body, making it easier for them to find sleep after. It’s also a way that many babies and toddlers love to connect with their parents. We can follow this up with something a bit calmer, like reading books, singing songs, saying prayers, or just cuddling in bed together.
The last piece of the bedtime routine will be the soothing component. What can we do to help our little ones drift off to sleep? This might look like rocking them in a rocking chair before transferring them to their sleep space, patting their bum or rubbing their back while they’re lying down, or feeding them to sleep.
It’s recommended that the naptime routine is a shortened version of the bedtime routine. Pick out a few key elements of your bedtime routine that you can recreate for naps. For example, you might give your little one a fresh diaper, put them into their Petit Lem sleep sack, turn on the sound machine, and read them one book before feeding them to sleep. Following a shortened version of the bedtime routine helps signal to your baby that sleep is the next step.
The naptime routine doesn’t need to be more than 5 to 10 minutes. Bedtime usually takes a bit longer - anywhere from 30 to 45 minutes - simply because it encompasses more pieces. It’s important not to rush through your routine with your child. Give yourself lots of time to go through each piece of your routine, and look for ways to use playfulness and connection as you go through the steps. If our child feels like we’re trying to hurry through their routine, they might interpret this as us hurrying to the separation, and ‘stalling’ can occur in an attempt to keep us with them longer.
Lastly, the research tells us that routines are dose-dependent: that is, the more we use them, the better they work. While it doesn’t matter how long we spend on each piece of the routine, it is very helpful to follow the same sequence of steps at each nap and bedtime.
When each piece of the nap or bedtime routine occurs in the same order, it helps our babies and toddlers know what they can expect to happen next. This can lead to less counterwill, less stalling, and quicker sleep onset. Our little ones know that sleep is the next step!
Following the same order also gives our young children feelings of autonomy. The nap and bedtime routine no longer feels like something that is being done to them, but rather, something being done with them. They’re more likely to become active participants in the routine simply because they know what is coming next! This can lead to a smoother nap and bedtime for everyone.
Want more baby and toddler sleep support? Be sure to follow @kaitlinklimmer on social media, and check out www.kaitlinklimmer.com for more blogs and resources on sleep in the early years.
Mindell JA, Li AM, Sadeh A, Kwon R, Goh DY. Bedtime routines for young children: a dose-dependent association with sleep outcomes. Sleep. 2015 May 1;38(5):717-22. doi: 10.5665/sleep.4662. PMID: 25325483; PMCID: PMC4402657.
Schlieber M, Han J. The Role of Sleep in Young Children's Development: A Review. J Genet Psychol. 2021 Jul-Aug;182(4):205-217. doi: 10.1080/00221325.2021.1908218. Epub 2021 Apr 7. PMID: 33825621.
